I was thinking about my children the other day. Well it was really wasn’t during the day it was at night, okay it was in the middle of night when I couldn’t sleep. You know those nights when you are wide awake and your mind decides to rehash every action or decision you’ve made throughout your entire life? Yep and it always seems to take me to the dark side. Well that night I was reliving my parenting decisions. Tossing and turning, wondering how much damage I’ve done to my children. Pondering if they ever sought therapy would I be the reason? Do they even like us as parents? My mind was spinning. I’ve decided that “in the middle of the night thoughts” lead to despair honestly!
They’re adults now. All of them on their own path, all living on their own. I’m sounding like I never see or hear from them which isn’t true but with their lives being hectic would they want to make time to see us. Would it be out of duty or because they genuinely wanted to?
We’re finally empty nesters. Life just got a little quieter for us and the jury is still out on whether we’re enjoying our new found freedom. There’s been a lot of together time – I mean a lot! (I may have been overheard saying to my husband – “You need a new hobby and it’s not me.” J) We’re adjusting to a new normal.
Which leads me to my dark thoughts from the other night; would our kids ever want to spend time with us again or would we be the parents who get the occasional phone call with updates? Contemplating our parental appeal to our children, I finally fell asleep.
Later the next day, I received a text from Anthony. “Do you and Dad want to come over to my house on Sunday?” My heart smiled. Anthony just invited us over to his house for dinner. I felt like I just got the golden ticket to Willy Wonka’s. Whoop Whoop!
I told Bob and he said “I know, he texted me too. He asked me to fish with him in the morning but Nick asked me to go somewhere with him first.” Both boys wanted to spend time with their Dad. Double whoop whoop! (I’ll get over that they didn’t ask me since it concerned hunting and fishing J)
On Sunday we went to Anthony’s. We sat outside, listened to Sinatra, ate a fantastic meal and ended the night making S’mores over his fire pit. Great conversation and great food. Anthony was the consummate host. We went home smiling.
My children are living hectic lives, each navigating their own path and knowing that they want to take the time to be with us is everything. I’m loving the adults they are becoming and am so happy that they want us to be a part of their journey. Blessed!
And concerning those middle of the night thoughts, I won’t be thinking about this subject any more, I’m blessed with the children I have. But knowing me, I will have no problem finding other things I can obsess about!
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